Chad Smith

‘Neath the orange and blue victorious
Our love shall never fail
There’s no other name so glorious
All hail, Florida, hail
University of Florida alma mater

I’ve decided to chronicle my experiences of the 2009 college football season — either from the stands or in front of the TV — because, well, Florida football is the one thing in the world I love more than Morrissey, and I think I’ve blogged that horse to death. There is little to report about the first two games — just watched the bloodbaths at home over frozen pizza. So, just as it does for the team, my real season starts Saturday.

Saturday, oh Saturday: “Rocky Top,” Lane Kiffin, Smokey, that shade of orange that both resembles vomit and induces it, the dumb camo hats emblazoned with that even dumber T. They’ll all be at Ben Hill Griffin Stadium on Saturday, and my blood is boiling just thinking about it.

There have been few regular season games I have looked forward to more than this one. I know the Vols are shells of their former selves, but their fucking coach has put such a target on their backs that their shoddy record over the last few years matters not. Not that Florida ever takes Tennessee lightly. But I have a feeling a 40-point win would be extra sweet for Urban Meyer and Co. this year after the shit Kiffin talked over the summer. Dude was in the league for 10 minutes and couldn’t keep his yap shut. At least Mark Richt was holding on to his gig like grim death when he pulled his stunt in Jacksonville in 2007. Sure, Richt won that battle. But war is hell, and he’ll learn that.

Saturday, Kiffin gets his first lesson.

Here’s the full list of those on whom knowledge will be dropped. Games I will be attending are in bold. Work ‘em silly.

Sept. 5 – Charleston Southern – Gainesville, Fla.
Sept. 12 – Troy – Gainesville, Fla.
Sept. 19 – Tennessee – Gainesville, Fla.
Sept. 26 – at Kentucky – Lexington, Ky.
Oct. 10 – at Louisiana State – Baton Rouge, La.
Oct. 17 – Arkansas – Gainesville, Fla.
Oct. 24 – at Mississippi State – Starkville, Miss.
Oct. 31 – Georgia – Jacksonville, Fla.
Nov. 7 – Vanderbilt – Gainesville, Fla.
Nov. 14 – at South Carolina – Columbia, S.C.
Nov. 21 – Florida International – Gainesville, Fla.
Nov. 28 – Florida State – Gainesville, Fla.